The fastest path to being the mom you have always wanted to be

When you aren’t being the kind of mom you want to be, consider this…

Sometimes our best just isn’t good enough.

You see, acknowledging this honestly is the first step towards greatness.

Too often, when we feel overwhelmed or lost or ragey or depleted in motherhood we become self-critical and shame ourselves but we don’t actually do anything that helps.

And this is probably because we simply don’t know what to do.

You see, your best may not be good enough NOT because there is something wrong with you….

….but because you simply don’t have what you need to show up differently.

Mothering is no different than anything else you do…

If you don’t have experience and skills in how to mother well, you simply won’t mother well.

So, first and foremost, let’s stop expecting ourselves to get it right off the bat.

What good mothering requires most is a capacity to stay steady amidst all the chaos, uncertainty, and unpredictability.

(This steadiness allows us to make rational decisions about what to do next.)

And what’s required to do that is a willingness and capacity to feel hard things without running away.

And what’s required to do that is immense self compassion, a sense of confidence in our ability to feel hard feelings and still be ok, and a collection of tools that helps to settle our nervous system and shift from stress back to calm.

Many (most?) of us weren’t taught these things.

What our kids need most from us is to feel loved and accepted.

They need to feel seen, heard, and understood.

And I’ll tell you from my experience being a mom for 17 years…..

Seeing them, really hearing them, and working to understand can be very, very, emotionally and psychologically uncomfortable.

So….. 3 steps for you:

1. Ask yourself (WITH COMPASSION)…. Is my best good enough right now?

2. If your answer is no, ask yourself what’s missing.

   What kind of help or support do you need in order to show up better?

3. Find that well of courage deep down within and seek out that support 💕

One final question: if your own parents had asked themselves this question and had taken those 3 steps, how might things have been different?

This, Dear Reader, is the path to being the mom you have always wanted to be.

✨first step to resilience in times of stress is taking care of your basic needs so you are resourced rather depleted. Join my Aligned Mama Reset to get there fast.